I'm so sorry to hear about the reactions of others to your phobia! I know how paralyzing the whole fear thing can be... having had several phobias myself, and also having been very afraid of vomiting myself. I don't know if it will help you, but for me it made it easier to just try and understand what exactly it was that I was afraid of in each thing. I know I've been afraid that I can't get any air and will choke, or that I'll embarras myself by vomiting in public and that everyone will stare at me, also the fear of the taste and the general look and of others vomiting is very familiar to me. The things you are afraid of in this particular thing may be different though. Talking to an understanding friend, who has had to deal with vomiting due to migraines has helped me. For sure it doesn't help that your dad is being like that about it, I suppose he never had a really intense fear so that he'd understand what it was like. I feel like more than watching those youtube videos you need an encouraging friend to talk to- maybe someone who shares your fear and understands what it's like. I take what you say very seriously, I know it is something that just is so real that you feel like it's not possible to not be afraid. I know 100% that you will be able to lift this fear, and I send you all my support with your work. You've started off really well. Try and find people that you can talk about it with, I know your phobia is quite common, and lots of people will need someone to talk to as badly as you do. I really hope you find the support you deserve!
