Comments for Phobia of people coming to my house

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by: Anonymous

When I was younger I went to a Posh school where all the kids mums and dads owned flippin mansions with tennis courts and had ponies. My family were working class and my house modest. I think this is where it started. The when I was a teen my best friend got addicted to heroin, stole from us and was there forth banned from coming into the house (quite rightly so). Then my parents divorced and I lived with my mother who rarely, it ever had friends over.

In my teens I was hurt by a number of things and built up barriers around me. I also never spoke about my anxieties/troubles with anyone as I had been told by my mother to always keep things to myself. I see this was and is an unhealthy way to live.

I have a fear of people coming into my house and I just get anxious. I am happy to let my partners friends in and my close family to a point, but I feel uncomfortable with my friends.

I agree, it is a fear of being judged... And also fear that people will see how uncomfortable I am feeling, so fearing the actual fearing.

I have a nice house and everyone commens how lovely it is. I just wish I could have more friends round, but actually enjoy them being round instead of doubting myself.

At the end of the day, they wouldnt have come in the first place if they didn't like you I guess ;)

Definitely a social anxiety
by: Michele

I am exactly like you but I have several other fears as well such as a fear of the phone, moths, leftovers, etc. If I had my way I would stay in my room and never come out. It is not laziness, it is out of pure fear. I simply will not answer the door unless I absolutely have no choice. The only person I am not affected by in any way is my son. I even ended up alienating my husband (now ex). I know people say submersion is the way to go but I just dont know how to get over the hump and to the first step. Its just too terrifying. With you worrying about cleanliness I wonder if it is a fear of being judged? Be careful and good luck with it.

Landlord and conflicts no no
by: Anonymous

I tried to explains this to my landlord, but she just don't care it's not that you want to be this way it's just this way. She likes to come over when ever she wants to. It drives me crazy, I just try my hardest to just do what I think the Lord will have me to do forgive her and tri and leave when she comes.

i understand
by: Anonymous

For me, the phobia is bad enough if i don't have a chance to get away, i end up in the bedroom shaking and crying. The bedroom has blackout curtains and a door i can close, so i feel safer. It's horrible. If my husband has friends over to play rock band or whatever, i will leave before the first person shows up or as they pull into the driveway. I have had to have my husband come home and get me out of the bedroom and out to my car so i can leave. That happened when my landlord sent workers over unannounced. His idea of scheduling is "sometime next week".

It's hard, and no one else seems to understand, so i am glad to know there are at least two other people in the world who know what i am talking about.

dont show up at my house, announced or unannounced.
by: Anonymous

Don't feel bad about it. I am 28 and realized I had this problem at 18 when I moved out of my moms. It's difficult to maintain healthy relationships while battling this but it is what it is. It's my space and I shouldn't have to share it. I do have a husband and 4 kids and I don't mind them but mother in law showing up or neighbor makes me almost turn white like a ghost. I do wish I was understood.

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