I have a strong fear of contamination, germs, and whenever I become sick (with flu or cold) I can't sleep because I am so stressed out. When I'm sick all I can think about doing is taking more precautions, using my hand sanitizer more, not touching any door handles. I do all of these things already but I'm convinced that I made a slip up and touched someone or somebody which is why I'm sick.
I can't take things off the top or the bottom (plates, cups). I can go near the sink. I'm terrified that the germs off of the used utensils and plates will get me sick. I can't hand wash anything; the last time I tried to clean the toilet (because someone had just used it an hour before) I had a severe panic attack; I cried, sobbed, and couldn't breath. I use hand sanitizer on my hands constantly and I have to touch things three by three times to make sure they're safe. I can't touch things my friends have, even if I know they're sick.
For these reasons I can't go into hospitals or doctors offices. I have a panic attack and can't do it. My Mom would have to literally drag me in.
I'm working on this little by little. I think it stems from when I actually got really, really sick with histoplasmosis at age 14. Ever since then I've avoided things.
For people suffering from the same problem, I hope you get help as I am.
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