Irrational fear or phobias

by Tyler
(St. George, UT USA)

I'm 27 and when I was 16 I had acne real bad and had tried everything from a to z to 'cure' it and NOTHING worked. So I resorted to Accutane, which has countleI'm 27 and when I was 16 I had acne real bad and had tried everything from a to z to 'cure' it and NOTHING worked. So I resorted to Accutane, which has countless side effects in the psychological aspect alone. Some that I experienced and still occasionally experience to this day are irrational fear or phobias and anxiety attacks. Also I have a hereditary condition called hyperglycemia, where you have to watch your sugar and carb intake and supposed to eat a high protein snack every 2 hours or so. This condition alone has countless symptoms from depression , fear and anxiety to physical symptoms. Any long story short, throughout my whole life I've had 'rollercoaster anxiety events' if you will, where I have a good period of 2-4 years of no worry and fear to several months or a year at a time with a new fear or worry. For example, in my childhood, I feared about getting cancer, then it went to fear of becoming gay, then in 2000ish got on Accutane and had some whack phobias of something like the moon rising over a cliff one evening sent me over the edge ( I do think a lot btw). I live in the desert city of St George, Utah, an hour and a half north of Las Vegas, to sort of put things into perspective a little. I developed this strange fear of these certain mountains (oddly, only these mountains and only certain angles of view of them)in the distance on the westside of our valley on which, of course the sun sets. I felt in the past and recently felt (could be a reoccurrence of the past?) like this familiar horizon or skyline was closing in on me or...I actually went blank just barely cuz it doesn't make sense to me (hence it must be irrational fear) why I at times get a nervous stomach when I look towards those mountains. Then at other times when I have mental clarity (eating right or what have you) I see beauty and have a normal perspective towards the mtns. I know I have to have OCD too, which obviously could ake me obsess over rational or irrational thoughts. To name a couple more fears or phobias I've had are of life itself, what we're made of, being 70 % water, breathing air and a bad 'episode' in 2006 of fearing the human brain and believing we as people were nothing more than walking brains...ss side effects in the psychological aspect alone. Some that I experienced and still occasionally experience to this day are irrational fear or phobias and anxiety attacks. Also I have a hereditary condition called hyperglycemia, where you have to watch your sugar and carb intake and supposed to eat a high protein snack every 2 hours or so. This condition alone has countless symptoms from depression , fear and anxiety to physical symptoms. Any long story short, throughout my whole life I've had 'rollercoaster anxiety events' if you will, where I have a good period of 2-4 years of no worry and fear to several months or a year at a time with a new fear or worry. For example, in my childhood, I feared about getting cancer, then it went to fear of becoming gay, then in 2000ish got on Accutane and had some whack phobias of something like the moon rising over a cliff one evening sent me over the edge ( I do think a lot btw). I live in the desert city of St George, Utah, an hour and a half north of Las Vegas, to sort of put things into perspectaive a little. I developed this strange fear of these certain mountains (oddly, only these mountains and only certain angles of view of them)in the distance on the westside of our valley on which, of course the sun sets. I felt in the past and recently felt (could be a reoccurance of the past?) like this familiar horizon or skyline was closing in on me or...I actually went blank just barely cuz it doesn't make sense to me (hence it must be irrational fear) why I at times get a nervous stomach when I look towards those mountains. Then at other times when I have mental clarity (eating right or what have you) I see beauty and have a normal perspective towards the mtns. I know I have to have OCD too, which obviously could ake me obsess over rational or irrational thoughts. To name a couple more fears or phobias I've had are of life itself, what we're made of, being 70 % water, breathing air and a bad 'episode' in 2006 of fearing the human brain and believing we as people were nothing more than walikng brains...

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