Hello my name is tessa and i'm scared of intimacy of any kind.

by Tessa
(Whakatane. Bay of plenty. NewZealand)

After just coming into teenage-hood and not being particularly good looking or anything i never got any boyfriends and my admirers were generally computer geeks and intermediate kids.

When i started high school and all my friends had boy friends or were dating and i slowly started getting more attractive and noticed i also started getting really freaked out about even the thought of being in any relationship.

As i now suffer from depression i realised part of it was probably brought on by my extremely low self esteem levels and thinking no one in the world would ever love me in that way and if i asked anyone out they would say no and if they said yes it would only be out of pity.

I cant watch any of my friends if they're holding hands out hugging their boyfriends and seeing happy couples together sends me into a state of shock.

I can’t handle anyone else's intimacy and i certainly can't imagine ever being with some one in my life.

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