Fear of Robots
Hi, I am a 17 years old girl, and I'm completely horrified by robots! But not any kind of robots, mostly robots that look like humans, animals, or anything that represents a living being, like animatronics. If they are geometrical and metallic looking, they won't affect me at all. Also, the more complex the robot is, my symptoms will be worse. The thought of things that look alive and can blend in, but are not, is terrible for me! If they are damaged and show failures, I feel even worse though.
The first memory I have of this fear of robots is of my cousin constantly putting one of those baby dolls that crawl and make baby noises to chase me when I was around 4 or 5. The doll was ugly and it's voice was horribly distorted, like when a toy's battery is dying. It also made that horrible mechanical sound robots make, I hate that sound. Even years after that, every time I spotted that doll lying around in my grandma's house, I would feel sick and my heart would start to race. This still happens every time I am forced to be near a moving doll.
Also, every time my family dragged me into amusement park rides, I would close my eyes, put my fingers in my ears, and cry the whole way. Nowadays I always find an excuse to avoid those, because it feels silly to say the truth.
But the worst panic attack I ever had was when I watched the movie "A.I." with my dad and sister when I was 10. I was standing it well, until the movie reached this part where there is this dump full of semi-destroyed androids picking up parts of different discarded androids to patch themselves up. I had a full panic attack. I started to shiver and cry, and no one in my own family could touch me because I was afraid they could be robots. I was afraid even I could be a robot and not know it. It took me months to be able to sleep with no problems again.
In comparison, "I, Robot" never affected me at all.
Sometimes, just the concept will trigger it. One year ago I played this cartoon-style game where by the end of the story you discover that all of the habitants of the village you are in are robots. I felt just a bit uneasy at the moment, but was surprised that just the concept of being surrounded by robots without knowing deprived me from two nights of sleep!
I have yet to find a person with the same fear. The closest phobia I found to what I have is automatonophobia, but mine is too specific, wax figures or dummies won't do anything to me.
Sorry if this is too long! I've been trying to overcome this phobia for years and talk with people about it, but no one seems to understand it. Any comments are welcome. Thank you for taking your time to read this!