Death Phobia is one not talked about too much....

by Ashley H.
(Clarksburg, WV)

Ok. Lets see if I can do this. My name is Ashley. I am 20 years old. I have death phobia. Just talking about it makes my heart beat really fast and I am crying already. It is like this phobia is controlling my life.

I have had this problem since I was 12 but it seems to be getting worse. Any time that I think about haw no matter what, someday, I am going to die. I am not a very religious person, I really don't know what to believe. I have tried going to church, but I always feel uncomfortable.

My boyfriend that I have been with for 2 years doesn't even know why I have the panic attacks that i have. He just holds me while I shake and cry uncontrollably, and can't talk, move, or anything. He just talks me through it and tells me it is going to be okay.

All I think about is when I am going to have the next panic attack. I can't go see movies that have anything to do with a lot of people dying, the world coming to an end, or anything of that nature.

I can't think about what i am going to look like in 20 more years. I feel trapped and I feel like I can't do anything about it because I don't have insurance and I am on my own with my 8 year old brother. I just need someone to talk to that understands what I am going through.

Thank you for reading my story and for those out there that are going through the same thing, just know that you are not alone.